It is important for parents to have similar rules, punishments and routines for their children after a divorce. Unfortunately, though, it’s not legally mandated. You can’t force your ex to follow your rules.
For instance, say you want to ground your child from television for a week because they cut school. You can do that if they’re at your house, but your ex doesn’t agree it’s needed. They can certainly allow your child to ignore your punishment and they can neglect to give them any ramifications.
Parents in this situation often say that it undermines their authority, and they’re right. It absolutely does. But what can you do about it?
Setting up a parenting plan
The best thing you can do is to sit down with your ex and create a parenting plan together. Remind them that you are both still parents and that things will go smoothly if you work together. Talk about how you just have your child’s best interests at heart, and how it will be best if you both lay down some common ground rules.
Ideally, your ex also wants to focus on your child’s best interests. They may disagree a bit on how to get there, and that’s when you may need to compromise. But, if the two of you really have that goal, you may find some common ground and set up a parenting plan that addresses your concerns.
As you work your way through what can be a confusing and stressful legal process, make sure you know what your parental rights are and what steps you need to take.
