As hard as you have tried to come to a mutual agreement on child custody with your spouse, it just is not happening. Anything you suggest gets turned down.
How will this issue be determined? The family court judge will look at everything which affects your children, then make a decision. Do not be surprised if the judge uses parenting styles to make a decision.
If you are not able to agree on custody arrangements, the judge will
Ideally, it is better for you and your spouse to come to an agreement on child custody and visitation. If you are not able to do this, the judge hearing your divorce case takes this responsibility. If you and your spouse have been equally unhappy about suggestions, one of you should expect to be displeased with the judge’s decision.
The judge in your case makes their decision by looking at the best interests of the children. This includes your relationships to the children, ability to care for them, work schedules, your health, where your residence is located and any history of abuse.
Your children need to be given emotional care
You and your spouse may relate differently to your children. One parent may give emotional care to the children while the other parent actually wants the children to give emotional care. Young children need their parents to give emotional care to them — they should not be expected to give emotional support to their parents.
During your marriage, one parent protected the children from the parent who expected emotional care from the children.
Who might the judge choose to have primary physical custody?
Pennsylvania’s child custody laws do not allow gender bias in child custody decisions. Each parent will be equally considered. If the judge figures out that one parent consumes emotional care for the children, they are likely to give sole custody to the other parent. Joint custody may not be emotionally healthy if one parent consumes their children’s emotional care.