There are some things that never come around twice — like the chance to see your four-year-old dressed as a Jedi on Halloween and the joy they experience going from house to house for candy.
When you and your co-parent share custody of the kids, the holiday season can be extra-stressful — for you and the kids. That starts with Halloween.
Before Halloween gets here, take a little time and think about how you and your co-parent can best manage this situation in a way that minimizes everybody’s discomfort.
Trick-or-treat together to show the kids your combined support
If you and your ex-spouse are on reasonably decent terms, it’s definitely worth considering. Children always benefit when they can share special events with both their parents. Naturally, you and your co-parent need to agree about whose neighborhood you’ll use on and plan ahead, but it’s a very doable option for many couples.
Divide the route and the responsibility
Maybe you don’t mind sharing the night, but you’re not exactly comfortable with making small talk with your ex-spouse the entire evening. Why not split the route?
If they’re trick-or-treating is expected to last two hours, why not plan things so that you hand out candy from whichever parent’s house has been chosen as home base while your ex-spouse walks the kids around for the first hour. Then, you simply switch out. You each get to experience the fun without having to spend much time together.
Take the kids to more than one event
What if you’re just not ready to work that closely with your ex-spouse quite yet? If the days and times for trick-or-treating in your neighborhood don’t match up to those in your ex-spouse’s neighborhood, each of you can take the kids solo. (And you can bet the kids won’t object to going door-to-door twice!) If the times are close together, you can always look for another event, like an indoor Halloween party or an event sponsored by the local mall.
Child custody issues can be very emotional — and complicated. Sometimes, the best solution for your family may mean thinking a little outside the box.